Lemon Oreos…

… or Bearing False Witness

Getting our youngest ready for school can sometimes be a challenge.  He is easily distractible, and I often spend most of my morning following up on him.  This morning I came out of the bedroom, where I was getting ready to leave, to make sure he had fed the dog.

“Yes.”  He said with a completely straight face.

Sanders, the Hungry Dog
(He may or may not be named
after a Democratic Socialist)

My mommy senses went on alert immediately.  I glanced outside and could see that our dog was in the exact same spot as earlier and the dish was empty.  There was not enough time for him to have eaten all his food. 

“Really?”  I asked.

“Yes, Mom.  Really.”

What followed was a short discussion on lying.  Providentially, we had just covered the 10 Commandments in our church last Sunday, so we were able to harken back to “bearing false witness” and how our lying causes others to lose faith in us.  We become untrustworthy. Then he lost all electronics for the rest of the day.  Because.  Lying.

Later, I was at the gym…

Ok.  Time out.  Disclaimer:  I JUST started doing this regularly.  I am not a gym rat.  Yet.  Now back to your regularly scheduled blog post…

I was at the gym and trying to figure out what I should eat for breakfast.  I began logging my food two days ago and I am loosely trying to use Weight Watcher points to curtail my overeating and eat healthier things. So, I wanted to know what my options were for today.  As I was calculating todays options I remember Last Night.  Yes.  Last Night.


You see, at around 9:20, right in the middle of watching the new episode of “This Is Us”, I had an emergency.  It was a Lemon Oreo Cookie emergency and involved 6 cookies with no justification whatsoever.  The thing was I did not log my emergency into my food log.  So according to my app I was pretty dang successful yesterday.

This all came flooding back to me this morning as I was planning what to eat today.  And it occurred to me.  I was “bearing false witness” against myself.  Nobody knows about my food log (well, now YOU do).  Who was I hurting by not being truthful about what I ate?  Me.  I was hurting me. I was causing myself to lose faith in myself.

Sometimes we blame aspects of our self-worth on others and that can be completely legitimate.  Abuse, bullying, snark, rejection… they can all contribute heavily to the way we value ourselves.  However, those small moments when we cover up, hide, “bear false witness” can eat away at our confidence bit by bit, causing us to lose faith in ourselves.

Right before writing this post, I pulled out my phone and recorded my Lemon Oreo emergency from last night.  And, yes, it put me over my point total for yesterday.  But the important thing to me today is that I am being honest with myself.  Instead of chipping away at my faith in myself, I am practicing faithfulness.  Today anyway.

What false witness have you been bringing against yourself?  What do you quietly bury that could be eating away at your self-confidence and worth?

Often we don’t know how to start living truthfully with ourselves.  Coaching can be an excellent way to identify areas of concern and be strategic about moving forward with confidence.  If that is something that resonates with you, I offer a free 20-minute phone or video consultation to see if coaching is the right fit for you.  I’d love to hear from you and see you start to shape your own story!

Purposeful Prayer

I wish…

I’m hoping…

It would be really great if…


If you are anything like me, then you’ve started sentences this way many times.  Maybe not always out loud.  Mine are usually in my head… the place where I dream and also the place where my fears and doubts tear those dreams down.

A couple Fridays ago, I met a friend for lunch.  We live over an hour away from each other, so we met in the middle to catch up after only being in touch through social media for years.  During our talk she mentioned how she had been dreaming and while she believed it was a God-given dream and received confirmation, she realized she hadn’t specifically asked God to fulfil this purpose in her.

I was struck by this and over the next few days I couldn’t shake it. 

Then I was doing my Bible study this morning… wait.  First let me just confess that this is NOT the norm for me.  I am terribly undisciplined when it comes to regular, daily devotions or study.  But I recently started up with a study that is forcing me to be more consistent.  In my notes this morning I read these words:

…God today often chooses to fulfill His promises in His people’s lives in answer to their purposeful prayer.

Did you read that?  I did and my response was, “Ok, God.  I get it. I am so sorry.”

It has dawned on me that while I feel like I’m in constant communication with God and when I’m thinking or dreaming or wrestling with something, I know and believe he is there listening, I hadn’t directly gone to God with some of these things in prayer… candid communion… speaking to HIM… not just allowing him access to my thoughts.

So, what am I going to do about it?  This week I will be working on purposeful prayer.  I have some wishes, dreams, purposes that I believe he wants to accomplish through me, and I have been holding them in my head.  I am going to come to him, in confidence that he hears me, and offer them up to him in purposeful prayer.  Will you join me?


Yes is a good word.  It has a connotation that’s positive… like adventure… change… new things.  But if you’re like me, you have probably said “yes” when what you really wanted to say was “no”.  There is pressure all around to say “yes”.  Yes to favors.  Yes to jobs that are good but are not aligned with our purpose.  Yes to “ministry opportunities” that you neither have time for or are gifted to carry out.  Yes to looking a certain way.  Yes to having that thing you really can’t afford.  

Author and philanthropist, Bob Goff, has famously said that he quits one thing every Thursday.   According to him, it’s a way to reevaluate and get rid of the stuff that doesn’t matter. It’s a way to create margin and bring sanity.  
Sometimes we have to say no to good things to make way for the best things.  This is difficult for me.  A real stretch.  For me it is part FOMO (fear of missing out) and part the people-pleasing side of me that I hate to admit exists.  So, how do I change this about myself?  

Reminders.  Like this one, from Anne Lamott.  Loved ones who know me.  Really know me and can speak into my life when I’m settling for the good things and missing out on the best things… the things that I was created for.

The Difference

“I can’t do this.”

I was pulling my normal crazy of talking to myself but this time my throat was choked with tears and I was peering over my tummy to try to read the scale.

There it was.  The number in all its digital truthfulness.  I had gained again.

Out of deep, long standing brokenness my mind began to twirl with all shades of unhealthy self-talk.

  • I will never conquer the issue of weight in my life.
  • I will always be the “out-going chubby red-head” … you know her, right?
  • Why even bother trying?
  • I’m speaking this weekend… what do I have in my closet to hide behind?
  • They are not going to take me seriously because I’m fat.
  • Why don’t I have any self-discipline?
  • When’s lunch?

Thankfully that very weekend someone entered into my story and agreed to coach me through my weight loss and health journey.  It made ALL the difference.  I have been on my journey for 3.5 weeks now.  I’m losing my cravings for most unhealthy things.  I’m down 8.5 lbs.  I’ve been forced to face the reasons why I want to stuff my face sometimes…even when I’m not hungry.  I am more in tune with my body and what it needs at any given moment.  I’ve realized that I was a Carb-a-holic… is that a thing?  It must be a thing.    I also know precisely why I want and need to do this.  The “why” is critical to success in any endeavor and I don’t know that I would have found it without my coach spurring me to do so. It is not easy.  But having my coach beside me is what has helped me stick it out thus far.  And trust me, 3.5 weeks is a marathon for me when it comes to eating right.

This whole past month just reinforces what I have believed for several years now.  When going through a transition, or stretching a goal, or making big decisions, having a COACH is invaluable.  It can mean the difference between living life in limbo or experiencing fulfilling success.  Why is this?


A coach...

What goal are you trying to crush right now?

Are you facing a transition that’s left you exhausted and bleary eyed?

Maybe you’re stuck and don’t even imagine a next step.

If you fit into any of these categories, perhaps a coach is just what you need.  In my case, I needed a coach within a specific niche with knowledge of a particular way of eating.  In your case, you may need the definition of coach I shared above.  I know that the times I have partnered up with a coach have been the times when I have experienced the most growth.

In 2017 I became certified as a Professional Coach because I have a passion for seeing people light up when they find their passion and purpose.  If you have ever considered getting a coach, I encourage you to reach out.  You will find the prices reasonable and the benefits invaluable.  Shoot me an email or give me call.  Or simply leave a comment below.  I’m excited to see what you do next!